Q: Describe yourself in 5 words or less!
A: So, I’ll list the five words and explain them.
Passionate – Whatever I’m seriously into, I go 150% into it. Growing up, I went through stages of obsessions. Veterinarian stuff, Indiana Jones, Little Mermaid, Dinosaurs, Cowboys, Anime… the list goes on and on. If I really want to know something, I go out and I do the research. I try to learn everything I can about it until it’s just pouring out of my ears. I can list off all the reason the sinking of the Titanic was as disastrous as it was. I can tell you the process of turning an animal hide into parchment paper the old fashioned way. I can tell you the early history of the Frankish empire in the 8th century. I am a wealth of useless knowledge because I like those things.
Awkward – With this wealth of useless knowledge, I have no social skills. I can read cues, like when someone’s upset, annoyed, etc. But don’t ask me to comfort them. I don’t know how and anything I say will probably sound shallow. I’m the kind of person that says “You too” after the waiter has said “Enjoy your meal”. I will purposely avoid confrontations as much as possible because it’s like a train wreck if I try to navigate them. I’m getting better and as long as I stay calm, I’m pretty okay. The staying calm part is what’s hard.
Compassionate – Yes, while I am social awkward, I do care deeply for people. I don’t like hearing that one of my coworkers is going through marital trouble or that a friend a thousand miles away may be hit by a storm. I want to reach out to these people and tell them that I hope the best for them and want them to be safe. BUT, I feel like approaching them is crossing a line somehow, so I don’t. Therefore, if you are a friend of mine or even a close acquaintance, know that I do care, even if I don’t show it.
Empathetic – I guess one reason I’m compassionate is because there’s a part of me that is deeply empathetic. You hurt, I hurt. And if I made you hurt, I’m gonna feel that much worse about it. Empathic and compassionate may be lumped together, but I do see them as separate. I don’t just want to send you a “get well soon” card. I want to heal the pain in some ways, because I know what it is to hurt. But again, this is where the awkwardness comes in and I don’t know how to verbalize my desire to help or advice.
Selfish – And under all of this, I can be inherently selfish. I want to go do things and see places and say things, but sometimes I wish I had the freedom to do so. I love my life and my family and I wouldn’t trade them for anything in the world, but sometimes I want things that contradict the things I love. It’s like a kid wanting a new toy when they have plenty of good ones at home. Yeah, I’m working on it. But I’m keeping it real with y’all.
Def: "The inability the think or act clearly, especially due to being in love"
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